The Beautiful New Born Children: Hey People! (Domino Records)

Hey, Beautiful New Born Children! Just got your record. It’s not bad! We admire your spunk. You burst exuberantly from our disc player, bat in hand, antsy-pantsy to smash us to smithereens! Your shout-alongs are infectious, like you’re clutching our shirt collars and bouncing in place, begging us to join you, yelling, “c’mon c’mon c’mon!” like a sugared-up, pig-tailed niece, and we can’t help but do exactly that! You’ve got that whole maniacal three-chord scrub down to an art, and you use it to great effect in your minute-long explosions. Our only question is, “Can you do anything else?” You give it a shot in that one song, “Up And Down And Round And Round,” where you’re all like, “We’re gonna improvise now!” but there’s nothing there! A few toe-dipping string-boings, some scaredy-cat skittering, but that’s it! We think you have potential—just grow out of your baby clothes. With love and affection, The People. (www.dominorecordco.com) 5 Blips out of 10 By Cory Frye