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Mar 18, 2020 Web Exclusive By Steve King

So, here we are, in the spring of an election year, with a collapsing stock market, imminent recession, and a pandemic superflu threatening to bring down all of civil society. The primaries aren’t over, but Democrats have their likely nominee. We need to have a conversation about the vice presidential selection that Joe Biden is already working on. Does the VP have any real bearing on the general election? It’s debatable, but in a general election with the two choices for president in their 70s, it has never been more important.

Finding a VP is a weird, nuanced mix of personality and strange alchemy. They need to complement the presidential nominee while at the same time drawing the right differences. It’s like mixing a potion. It has to be just right. Biden needs a young, dynamic, inclusive vice president who can not only take over in the event of his demise, but who can win again in 2024 if and when he doesn’t seek reelection. He can’t dodge or botch it like Clinton did in 2016; he has to leave it all on the field. And he knows it. Biden will need a minority woman on his ticket to equal out all of his old whiteness.

We could talk about some of the long shot candidates, like Val Demmings, Megan Thee Stallion, Oprah, Sally Yates, and Michelle Obama, but I think we need to stick to the top tier picks. Biden could still surprise us, but we all know how this ends.

Senator Kamala Harris

Harris didn’t catch fire the way many of us thought and it’s a bummer. Even more of a bummer is that she will do nothing for the electoral map, and slightly piss off the Eternally Pissed Left. She can campaign and debate her ass off, but Democrats need someone who can wow them. We just need to hope Biden wins so he can appoint Harris as Attorney General so she can throw Trump’s ass in jail.

Senator Elizabeth Warren

Who brings less to the ticket than Harris? I’m sorry. I take no joy in acknowledging that. It’s just the way things worked out. Warren has the same problem. She can’t turn out voters and she comes from a state with a Republican governor. So, if the Senate is competitive and really up for grabs, the math will doom any senator from a red or purple state.

Senator Amy Klobuchar

Klobuchar checks all the boxes for a traditional Democratic ticket and she comes from Minnesota, so her replacement would be chosen by a Democratic governor and her midwest appeal could help to rebuild the Blue Wall, but Biden is doing that all on his own. And this will not be a normal ticket.

Senator Tammy Duckworth

Duckworth is the one that you might not see coming. She’s a veteran, a total fucking badass, and is loved by the base and party bosses. She checks the female minority box, and can throw mad shade like nobody else.

Former State Rep. Stacey Abrams

Abrams has a power and magic that can’t quite be defined. People love her. Fucking love her. My wife loves her and we live in Maryland. Trump has set a new standard for job experience when it comes to politics, so her thin resume will not be an issue. She has passion. She has the IT Factor that the others don’t. She would not only energize the ticket, but solidify Biden’s relationship to African-American voters. Oh. And because her Georgia gubernatorial run was stolen, she would put the state in play and for the first time since the 1990s. Think on that.

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